OLYMPIQUE MONTREUX TEAMS SCORE 13 GOALS TODAY, CONCEDING NONE

WAY TOO MUCH KAKA

By R. M. Danish

Sports Writer

Cottonwood, Aug. 22.--  Ricardo "Kaka" Sobreira was a man, well, boy, on a scoring mission this evening. The teenager started in the first division game and opened the scoring in the 4th minute. He then started in the Premiership game and opened the scoring in the 7th minute. He again scored in the 86th minute.

Indeed it was a Kaka show all afternoon at Cottonwood Field.

The first division game pitted Olympique Montreux against FC Crisnet.
 

In addition to Kaka·, defensive ace Victhor Soares, David Chevez (hot trick), Tim Ballantyne, and Gabriel Causse found the back of the net.

The side played great one-two touch soccer, making good use of the big pitch to the detriment of FC Crisnet who played the first five minutes with only nine players.

The late arrival of Crisnet’s remaining players did not help much as the Olympians executed their game plan to near perfection, rolling to a 6-0 lead at the break.

Showing respect for their opponents, the Olympians were instructed to maintain possession in the second half, make quick one touch passes, but to not run up the score.

David Chevez, last season leading scorer, was making his first full appearance this season after a winter injury. Davi-gol scored a hot trick, closing the scoring on a penalty.

…and in the Premiership

In the Premiership game, Bosnia USA started by playing well, featuring a number of good players, namely former OM champions Alija Hijdarevic (2001, 2002) and Ninja Djurasovic (2002), along with Mexican playmaker Antonio Vasquez (OM 2003).

Unfortunately, Bosnia USA still lined up the likes of Admir Softic and Adis Alagic. The latter used be a great player but for several years now, he prefers to dish out cheap behind-the-back shots while screaming to the refs: "It is not my fault if [my victims] are too short."

This evening, Adis made young Sina and Kaka his special targets.

"Adis was an OM star in 2001 and 2002. How he went from very good soccer player to schoolyard bully is simply amazing. I used to compare him to Patrick Viera for his pace, grace and style," said OM manager Bel-Ami de Montreux who played with and managed the player for two championship seasons in the Hispanic league.

"It must be the Zlatan influence."

It was only a short two weeks since Bosnia USA defender Zlatan Ridzalovic and two his mates physically assaulted and slapped a young referee who had the audacity to red card Zlatan.

Along with Alain Delon (sic), a red card collecting specialist, and Admir "Fock Yoo" Softic, it was only a matter of time before that team became unglued.

Lately, Admir’s only game is to spit "Fock Yoo" or "Fock yo’ mutha" each time he is near Bel-Ami.

Nutmegged King

Playing on top to fill in for the absent Eduardo Lalo Romero, midfielder Steve McMurdie scored twice, at the 18th and 32nd minute.

In the 80th minute, left-winger Jantzen Romney froze the keeper and then nutmegged him to score the fourth goal.

Kaka scored again in the 86th minute after a solo run through the tired Bosnian defense.

Garrett Losee closed the scoring one minute later.

Last week, OM's first division defeated Raging Yetis 3-1 and the Premiership beat Odyssey Web 5-1 on goals by Jantzen Romney, Garrett Losee (twice) and defender Zach Burton.

The Olympians are trying to capture titles in both divisions.